It’s Not Too Much To Ask

Somebody needs to invent a virtual touring mechanism for when you're watching a movie online or at home. This guy is lying on a couch and for a brief moment the camera panned over the art on the wall above. I didn't want to rewind (how prehistoric is that!); I just wanted to click and scroll over his head while he was talking.

In the same vein, I’ve been saying since 1999—at least!—that somebody needs to invent emailing food. People are always emailing me about what they are cooking. TORTURE! Of course, if you could email food, you could email anything and where would the post office be then? Defunct. This is my notice to the USPS: Give it up now! You Are Doomed! UPS and Fedex are probably still OK as there will still be things too large to email that people will want to send one another, such as elephants and furniture, and who knows how long it will take to work out the kinks of losing things in cyberspace. Could be a whole new industry for those out-of-work postal employees: Cyberspace Lost and Found.

Another thing, I need to learn to astral travel right away. Practice makes perfect but I’m not at all sure I know the right way to start. Any reputable teachers around? I think it could be something like the holograms in Stars Wars, which are really only videos, only more life size and ethereal—kind of ghostlike. Or like beaming yourself up and down like Star Trek. If everybody would learn how then it likely could put airplanes, etc., out of business, but I don’t think everybody is going to be able to do it, never mind want to do it. Although I don’t know why not.

Wait, let’s astral travel into the dang movie—now THAT’S an idea.